Sunday, December 31, 2006
its the final countdown
developing capacity for self-evaluation is #1;
stopping smoking is a by product of #1;
therefore, the goal becomes secondary and much easier to achieve.
not that this is a post about new years resolutions, but i have to post this anyway.
i've decided to quit smoking. yeah, well, health/annoyances/whiners blah blah. the point is, i figure that there should probably be a time, and 30 is as good a round number as any. so, come my 30th birthday, i am ceasing my habit for good.
obviously, i don't know how its going to go. these days, if i want a cigarette, i have one, if i don't want one, i don't. i just don't care about it all that much. and this is the part that you say "yeah, sure". but really. i'm not really addicted to smoking so much as its something to do and its just been something that i've gotten used to over the years. i know that a lot of people are addicted to smoking, so i'm not trying to trivialize their experience (both smoking and trying to quit same), i'm just saying that i smoke not b/c i need to so much as (stupidly) i want to.
and now you say, well, if that's true, why don't you just quit? just stop and never smoke again? well, i know myself. my mind doesn't work like that. i have to want to stop something. if i just say i don't care either way, then i smoke. and i'll prove it. i haven't had a cigarette since last saturday, which is exactly 7 days ago, and i haven't even really wanted one. oh, i thought about it 3 times, but never wanted it bad enough to actually go buy a pack.
so, what's my point? my point is this. with the end of the year coming, and new year's resolutions just around the corner, people all around are deciding to quit smoking. and they've been bombarded with commentary about how hard it is. and i'm not saying that its not. i'm just saying that before embarking on the task, and then rushing out and getting all the nicotine gums in the city, consider some self reflection first. what kind of person are you? do you get addicted to things quickly? or not at all? do you smoke b/c you're addicted or b/c you just haven't really bothered to quit b/c it was never the right time. i've set a date b/c i know what kind of personality type i am, and that's that. i need to set deadlines or goals for myself. for me, it's more about the date then the smoking, if that makes any sense.
before you can do anything, you have to know who you are and why it is you do what you do. then you can worry about figuring out how to solve whatever habit/addiction/conflict you have.
stopping smoking is a by product of #1;
therefore, the goal becomes secondary and much easier to achieve.
not that this is a post about new years resolutions, but i have to post this anyway.
i've decided to quit smoking. yeah, well, health/annoyances/whiners blah blah. the point is, i figure that there should probably be a time, and 30 is as good a round number as any. so, come my 30th birthday, i am ceasing my habit for good.
obviously, i don't know how its going to go. these days, if i want a cigarette, i have one, if i don't want one, i don't. i just don't care about it all that much. and this is the part that you say "yeah, sure". but really. i'm not really addicted to smoking so much as its something to do and its just been something that i've gotten used to over the years. i know that a lot of people are addicted to smoking, so i'm not trying to trivialize their experience (both smoking and trying to quit same), i'm just saying that i smoke not b/c i need to so much as (stupidly) i want to.
and now you say, well, if that's true, why don't you just quit? just stop and never smoke again? well, i know myself. my mind doesn't work like that. i have to want to stop something. if i just say i don't care either way, then i smoke. and i'll prove it. i haven't had a cigarette since last saturday, which is exactly 7 days ago, and i haven't even really wanted one. oh, i thought about it 3 times, but never wanted it bad enough to actually go buy a pack.
so, what's my point? my point is this. with the end of the year coming, and new year's resolutions just around the corner, people all around are deciding to quit smoking. and they've been bombarded with commentary about how hard it is. and i'm not saying that its not. i'm just saying that before embarking on the task, and then rushing out and getting all the nicotine gums in the city, consider some self reflection first. what kind of person are you? do you get addicted to things quickly? or not at all? do you smoke b/c you're addicted or b/c you just haven't really bothered to quit b/c it was never the right time. i've set a date b/c i know what kind of personality type i am, and that's that. i need to set deadlines or goals for myself. for me, it's more about the date then the smoking, if that makes any sense.
before you can do anything, you have to know who you are and why it is you do what you do. then you can worry about figuring out how to solve whatever habit/addiction/conflict you have.
Monday, December 18, 2006
some serious hallelujahs
my friend kelly and i attended at the Toronto Symphony Orchestra yesterday at the Roy Thompson Hall. we went to see Hendel's Messiah.
the TSO is always phenomenal. i used to play violin and was in small productions of orchestra like concerts (when i was younger mind you), and i was in several choirs (also as a child, man, i quit everything as a kid, someone should have asserted a little more discipline, hint hint, mom). anyway, what i'm saying is that i appreciate a good orchestra and choir just even from the understanding of dedication that it actually takes.
it was beautiful. a little religious, but then, you can't expect anything less when you go see an orchestra event based on the life of the messiah. i could have done without the audience getting up and almost praying at the lengthy "hallelujah" section. and the amen at the end, while harmonious and inspiring, was a little long at about 10 minutes.
but overall, still worth it. but its the TSO so its always worth it. and you can't go wrong when you're sitting in the centre 8 rows back, and its free (boss has some good connections). so thanks bill.
Below is a pic of the Roy Thompson.
the TSO is always phenomenal. i used to play violin and was in small productions of orchestra like concerts (when i was younger mind you), and i was in several choirs (also as a child, man, i quit everything as a kid, someone should have asserted a little more discipline, hint hint, mom). anyway, what i'm saying is that i appreciate a good orchestra and choir just even from the understanding of dedication that it actually takes.
it was beautiful. a little religious, but then, you can't expect anything less when you go see an orchestra event based on the life of the messiah. i could have done without the audience getting up and almost praying at the lengthy "hallelujah" section. and the amen at the end, while harmonious and inspiring, was a little long at about 10 minutes.
but overall, still worth it. but its the TSO so its always worth it. and you can't go wrong when you're sitting in the centre 8 rows back, and its free (boss has some good connections). so thanks bill.
Below is a pic of the Roy Thompson.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Hu's on First
| this video made me laugh so hard. at some point, i just got so disoriented. watch it. trust me. | |
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Don't be lazy
i've heard this word being thrown around quite a bit lately, so i have to comment. i believe, but i could be wrong, that i might be a touch (just a wee bit mind you), jaded.
but, i take it as a compliment. and i'll tell you why.
its takes a dedicated, thinking, relentless person, someone willing to consume a lot of energy, to be a jaded person. seriously. think about it - a person that is not jaded, takes things at face value. you say "he couldn't have done that, he's not that bad" to a non-jaded person, and they probably believe you. or at least let it go.
now, a jaded person. well, there's a whole lot of stuff going on there with the same comment. there's doubt of that person in general, in the human race as a behavioural humanity, there's cynicism about man (men) in stereotype. i mean, really, there's a lot of thought process going on. it would be easier to just accept it. but no, we jaded persons are dedicated to our ways. at the end of the day, we are not depressed. just tired.
so, next time, consider this comment and think not that i am jaded, but that i'm considering all my options. i'm philosophizing.
but, i take it as a compliment. and i'll tell you why.
its takes a dedicated, thinking, relentless person, someone willing to consume a lot of energy, to be a jaded person. seriously. think about it - a person that is not jaded, takes things at face value. you say "he couldn't have done that, he's not that bad" to a non-jaded person, and they probably believe you. or at least let it go.
now, a jaded person. well, there's a whole lot of stuff going on there with the same comment. there's doubt of that person in general, in the human race as a behavioural humanity, there's cynicism about man (men) in stereotype. i mean, really, there's a lot of thought process going on. it would be easier to just accept it. but no, we jaded persons are dedicated to our ways. at the end of the day, we are not depressed. just tired.
so, next time, consider this comment and think not that i am jaded, but that i'm considering all my options. i'm philosophizing.
Sunday, December 10, 2006
New meaning to the phrase
there are only a few situations in life in which its fun to spin. drunkenness is of course on top of the list, whirling around as a child over and over again is another. however, being sober and getting vertigo suddenly, all the time, is not a fun time.
recently, i've developing this symptom. its passing now, but it was there for a good week. every time that i got up in the morning, my eyes would roll to the back of my head, then they would tunnel out and roll to the right. always to the right, i'm not sure why. then, every time i'd move, i'd get serious vertigo, with the world around me just spinning out of control. couldn't go to work for an entire week (ok, well, i guess sickness has its perks). and, the best part of all, lots of visits to the doctors, blood tests, x-rays, ecgs, and two ear experts, in order to find out.... nothing. yeah. we can send robots up to Mars, but i'm not sure why i have vertigo.
i've learned a lot recently though. i learned that its usually an inner ear infection (not this time thanks), its associated with hitting your head (nope, strike two), well, it goes on, but bottom line, mine doesn't fit into any expected cause. so, you get doctors saying, "well, i know its not...." x, y, or z. i love when doctors don't know what you have.
and what could it be? well, that's a good question, let me tell you. it could be a virus in the back of my head. it could be calcium build-up in the hipocampus, or it could be some other not so fun stuff. i'm shooting for a or b of the scenario. i have one set of results coming tomorrow, so we'll see.
recently, i've developing this symptom. its passing now, but it was there for a good week. every time that i got up in the morning, my eyes would roll to the back of my head, then they would tunnel out and roll to the right. always to the right, i'm not sure why. then, every time i'd move, i'd get serious vertigo, with the world around me just spinning out of control. couldn't go to work for an entire week (ok, well, i guess sickness has its perks). and, the best part of all, lots of visits to the doctors, blood tests, x-rays, ecgs, and two ear experts, in order to find out.... nothing. yeah. we can send robots up to Mars, but i'm not sure why i have vertigo.
i've learned a lot recently though. i learned that its usually an inner ear infection (not this time thanks), its associated with hitting your head (nope, strike two), well, it goes on, but bottom line, mine doesn't fit into any expected cause. so, you get doctors saying, "well, i know its not...." x, y, or z. i love when doctors don't know what you have.
and what could it be? well, that's a good question, let me tell you. it could be a virus in the back of my head. it could be calcium build-up in the hipocampus, or it could be some other not so fun stuff. i'm shooting for a or b of the scenario. i have one set of results coming tomorrow, so we'll see.
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Buy of the Week
This is my new camera. I got so sick of my panasonic (which, i confess, i only had for about a year), that i couldn't stand it. so in true form, i went and purchased a new one. but, this time, i did my homework. i actually researched cameras: specs, reviews, what to look for depending on what kind of user you're going to be. and this was a good suit for me.This is the Kodak Z612. it a nice light camera, with 12x optical zoom (i turned off the digital zoom b/c its useless and it actually makes pics worse), 6.4 mp, electronic image stabilization, good battery life, etc etc. The two things that i read about the most when it comes to cons of the camera were that the 4-way navigation is small (it is, but i don't have big fingers like some guys so its not really a problem for me, though i might not suggest it for men) and that when you take out the battery to recharge, it loses the setting, which means that you would have to input the date manually every time. i don't really care about this, as i import manually into my computer anyway, but for those that like to do things automatically and are particular about dates, then i wouldn't suggest the camera. otherwise, though, its a great camera. it takes nice crisp pictures from far and in micro mode. and it has a lot of existing settings depending on the kind of shot you're going to be taking (ex: beach, snow, fireworks, text, museum, night, candle, portrait etc.) i've been taking pics just to test everything out, and i'm still happy so that's always good. below are a few examples of pics taken with this camera (or on flickr).
The End of Privacy - Whitaker