Big Wide World

i'm so bored, i can't even describe it. and here are the reasons why. i have no life. no, really. all the friends that i could do things with that i would enjoy work in the day, and i work in the evenings so i never get to see them. like right now, i went out to the movies with rob, and i'm still all prettied up, but now have nowhere to go b/c he has to get up early to go to work. wow, i have problems ey?
anyways, i should probably find a different job or something to do, but i haven't yet. not sure why.
i went out on the weekend and got a little buzzed, and came home and wrote the saddest letter of my life. no really. its the saddest letter i've ever written or read. not bad sad. good sad, but none the less, sad. but i haven't mailed it yet. i'm still trying to decide if i do want to mail it. man, it seemed like such a good idea at the time, and now it just seems to sad. but i don't wanna throw it out cause its probably the most honest thing i've ever written down. so, we'll see. i might stash it away and mail it years from now, who knows. i'm really glad that i got it down on paper though. sees kind of a relief and somewhat cathartic, i highly recomment it. i think i should do more, esp. when i'm buzzed. probably cause we're much more honest with the world and with ourself when we've had a few. or, that could just be me. trust me, if i got captured by enemies, they wouldn't have to torture me. all they'd have to do is gimme booze. i'd spill it all. i'd be saying things i had in my head for years and didn't know about myself. with enough booze, i could probably tell them where hoffa was buried. man, there goes my shot at being a spy. damn it, that's one dream down the tube.